The New Year Column

Hi folks, wish you a HAPPY NEW YEAR…!!!

All those who can read this story, survived the Mayan Apocalypse, those who cannot read are trying to survive the hangover from last night. Some of you stayed up last night to witness the arrival of 2013 and some to make sure that 2012 leaves. Last night I found an old lamp, you remember the lamp from the movie ‘Aladdin’, I was happy to have it and started thinking what my three wishes should be. Decided to head back home with the lamp and was excited to imagine how a giant genie magically appears in a cloud of smoke and say ‘Yes my master what can I do for you?, I give you three wishes.’ I was anxious for the moment, will it sound like Robin Williams look like Barbara Eden? I reached home and rubbed the lamp with expectations.  I rubbed it once, nothing happened rubbed again no smoke no genie. Tried over again and again but no ‘out come’. In frustration and annoyance I threw the lamp against the wall I was disappointed. 

Then the cap on the lamp opened, a short and slim humanoid creature coming out of it. “What the hell is this”, I exclaimed and the genie replied “not ‘what’ say who the hell is this? I am the genie of the lamp, you are the one who disturbed my sleep.” You cannot be a genie, I hammered back, no smoky clouds, you are a slim creature. The genie looked at me as if I am a zoo animals and answered, You humans, do you understand anything about pollution, you have already spoiled the planet a lot with smoke we don’t want to add to it’s woes, thats why we avoid smoke now a days.  Regarding my slimness it seems my diet plan is working, I am avoiding all the junk fast food. After a pause I said, so I will get my three wishes. On this the genie said the union of genies has decided to reduce their number of wishes from three to two. This has to blamed onto the staggering economy, inflation and cut fiscal deficit. The unoriginality and repetitive nature of the wishes also prompts us for such steps. Now I had fewer options, I thought of seeking the genies advice on what should I ask for? The genie smiled and said I don’t know its you choice, everyone asks for some variation wealth, or power as the first wish,  some kind of sex appeal, beautiful men or women; depending on the gender and sexual orientation of the wisher, is the most asked second wish. Although this second wish is a waste; as wealth or power generally gets you the sex you want.” I don’t talk about the third wish as that option is not there anymore. And don’t try to act over smart by asking me for extra wishes as the second one. This will nullify your last wish of having wealth, turning you into a beneficiary of social security system.   Since you have asked my advice you have only one wish left, he added.

I started pondering about my wish. What should I ask the genie: a fortune of wealth, peace of mind, trouble for enemies, a sexy  babe in my side or good health. The clock ticked midnight and the shout and cheer for new year emerged all around. I woke up to the reality, there are no genies, no wishes out of blues. If you want something strive for it, A better world and life comes with your efforts not with genies. Eat drink and be merry,

cheers for the new year, happy new year